


You Won't Be Alone

by LadyShadowphyre



Series: Something Beautiful [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Amelia just wants somebody to love, Asexual Amelia, Asexual Character, F/M, M/M, One-Sided Soulmates, Serious Discussions, Soulmate AU, Soulmate-Dreams, moderately happy ending, sad Amelia, sad Jimmy, soulmate misfire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-06-15
Packaged: 2018-11-14 05:12:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11201157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyShadowphyre/pseuds/LadyShadowphyre
Summary: Amelia Everett had been looking forward to meeting her soulmate and having her very own happily ever after. When she dreamed about the handsome but sad-eyed James Novak from church on her eighteenth birthday, she was thrilled... until he told her that he'd never dreamed of her, and that he already knew his soulmate was someone else.





	1. Maybe You Could Use a Hand to Hold

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Zetal (Rodinia)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/gifts).



> Amelia's turn for her soulmate dream! The title comes from the lyrics of the Legend Seven song "Call On Me" from their album "Blind Faith". Amelia seems like the kind of teenager who'd listen to Christian rock, and I liked the irony.

**I** F THERE WAS one thing Amelia Everett could be sure of when she went to bed the night before her eighteenth birthday, it was that she was going to love her soulmate and live happily ever after. Her father had tried to caution her against getting her hopes up, but Amelia had been fed all her life with stories of fairytale romances and God rewarding His most faithful and was certain that she knew better.

Her dream certainly began promisingly enough. She was standing in the middle of the Catholic church her family attended every week, the walls gleaming white from the sunlight pouring through one side of the windows. Eagerly, she looked around for her soulmate, hoping to spot him (she assumed it was a him) standing in one of the patches of sunlight. No one was there, and, frowning, she turned to look towards the darkened other side of the church.

A lone figure sat on the front row of one of the pews, dark haired head bowed and shoulders curved inwards as if in prayer. Cautiously, she walked down the aisle and around the end of the pew to stand in front of him, but he didn't acknowledge her presence and, after a moment, she impatiently put her hand out to touch his shoulder.

That earned her a response at least. The man jerked and looked up with wide blue eyes, and Amelia gasped as she recognized him. James Novak, three years older than her and a regular attendee at this same church. They'd hardly ever spoken, exchanging a few polite pleasantries, but nothing more, and he'd never approached her.  _ He _ was her soulmate?!

"Sam?" James called out, looking around. Amelia went still, confused, and James called again more urgently, "Sam, are you here?"

"Um... no, it's... it's Amelia," she stammered after a moment. James was still looking around the church, as if he hadn't even heard her, and she reached out to touch him again. It was James's turn to go still in confusion, eyes darting around before finally dropping to where her hand rested on his arm. He swallowed.

"Oh," he said after a moment. "Of course, it wouldn't... it's too soon for it to be Sam, I knew that, but...." He stopped and swallowed, then looked up in the direction of Amelia without actually looking at her. As if he couldn't see her. "I'm sorry. You probably were expecting to dream of someone who had dreamed of you, but I can't see you, so...."

"But you're my soulmate!" Amelia protested, her grip tightening. "You had to have dreamed of me if I'm dreaming of you!" James winced, glancing down at her hand.

"I guess that grip means you're angry," he muttered. "I don't blame you for being angry, and..." He gave a faintly bitter, almost rueful smile. "I'm sorry you got stuck with me."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Amelia demanded, but James kept speaking as if he couldn't hear her.

"That's actually what my soulmate said in my dream three years ago," he said, and Amelia's world collapsed. Distantly, she heard him adding, "Sam's ten years younger than me, so we decided to wait until he has his dream to make contact. Uh, I'd appreciate it if you keep that part to yourself. My parents still think my soulmate is female, and with seven more years to wait I'm not in a hurry to correct them, you know?" She watched blankly as he scrubbed a hand over his face and sighed. "Or, I guess you could tell me that if you decide to come find me anyway. He did tell me not to wait for him, but I just... how am I supposed to be in a relationship with someone when I have a soulmate out there whom I have no intention of ignoring when he's old enough to contact me?"

How indeed?

Hesitantly, Amelia loosened her grip and stepped in closer, dropping down to one knee in front of James, and pulled the sad-eyed man into a careful hug. His chest hitched, and then he slowly lowered his head until it rested on her shoulder.

"Thank you," James whispered roughly. "I'm sorry. James Novak, Normal, Illinois. My friends and family call me Jimmy."

"I'm sorry, too, Jimmy," Amelia whispered, testing the name out on her tongue even though she knew he couldn't hear it. She squeezed his shoulders briefly and carefully slid her hand down to hold one of his as she took a seat on the pew beside him, staring almost blindly up at the crucifix above the altar. They sat together in silence, Amelia holding Jimmy's hand, until the dream came to an end.

Consciousness came slowly to Amelia. Her mother was supposed to call her out of school today so she could have some time to make any calls or arrangements she needed to meet up with her soulmate. She had tried to argue that she shouldn't miss school, no matter how eager she was to find her match, but her mother had insisted.  _ Probably because she thinks I'll want to start planning the wedding immediately _ , she thought with a grimace, and then groaned softly as she realized that if her dream had gone the way she'd thought it would that was  _ exactly _ what she would have wanted to do.

With a glance at the clock and another at her still-closed bedroom door, Amelia carefully rolled over in bed until her back was facing the door and stared at the poster for Legend Seven's "Blind Faith" album she had pinned there, silently acknowledging the irony. She had a decision to make before she had to face her parents, and a lot of thinking to do before Sunday.


	2. Don't You Know I've Felt So Lonely Too

**S** UNDAY REALLY COULDN'T come soon enough, Amelia decided. She'd managed to put her parents off asking the day of her birthday by telling them it was complicated, he's older, and that she really needed to talk to him about things first before talking to anyone else. Her father had offered to drive her over to see her soulmate, but that would have meant giving her parents a name and she didn't want to do that either until she'd decided what she was going to say to him.

Her mother didn't understand that part at all. She'd had her dream, found Amelia's father the next day, and had planned their wedding almost immediately. Up until she'd had her dream, Amelia had agreed that would be a great way to do things, but... complicated.

Thankfully, her father was on her side about being careful and cautious, and helped her with getting to the big library in Chicago Friday after school to do some serious research into the subject of soulmates, dreams, soul bonds, and the various relationships that formed from those connections. Part of her was disappointed to learn that it wasn't always a romantic connection, but she made herself focus on the relief instead. After all, fairytales didn't exactly go into much on the lives of the prince and princess after they got married, and her mother hadn't let her read the Song of Solomon in the Bible until she was sixteen and it still didn't make a lot of sense. She knew the mechanics of sex to create children, and she thought she might even want one or two kids eventually, but she had never been able to picture herself going through with the act of sex. It turned out that there was a medical procedure she could have done to have a baby without sex being a factor. That discovery had made her slump in her chair from relief until she considered that even if she didn't want to have sex with Jimmy he might feel differently.

_ He's waiting for Sam, _ she reminded herself, but the twisting in her gut only eased a little.

Despite her fervent wish to just get things over with so her mother would stop pestering her once or twice a day, Amelia was still a nervous wreck inside by the time Sunday rolled around. She ate her breakfast and brushed her teeth almost mechanically, then put on the dark blue dress and shoes she'd chosen to wear. Her blond hair was brushed and pulled back into a simple tail that she tied with a white ribbon, her concession to her mother's old stories of the virgin maiden meeting her soulmate while dressed in white. No makeup, since she didn't think her hands were steady enough and she didn't want her mother to help and run the risk of her using blue eyeshadow on her again, but she did put on the little silver Saint Amelia pendant her father had given her for her Confirmation. She'd blushed and stammered like crazy at the time, not liking the possible implications, but now she felt the need of the extra comfort.

Jimmy was already in the sanctuary when she arrived with her parents, sitting in the same spot on the pews that he'd been sitting in her dream. Where he always sat ever since he turned eighteen, she realized slowly, watching his bowed head.

She sat with her parents for the service, and did her best not to let her eyes stray to Jimmy too often. It was especially difficult when she somehow ended up directly behind him in the line to receive the Sacrament, and she only kept her composure because her mother was directly behind  _ her _ . She still felt her gut clench sharply when her lips touched the chalice where his lips had moments before, even though the priest had wiped the rim first.

When the service ended, she firmly told her parents to go on to Fellowship without her and, with more confidence than she felt, made her way to the front of the church and carefully sat down on the pew, not close enough to touch, but still closer than she would have sat otherwise. She felt him turn to look at her in confusion and pressed her lips together to master the urge to smile or laugh or cry--  _ here _ he could acknowledge her.

"Uh... can I help you?" he said after a moment when she still hadn't managed to say anything. The question was so simple, so mundane, she almost laughed in his face.

"I don't know," she managed finally, her voice tight and strained. "Maybe. I think.... I'm supposed to help you."

"I'm sorry, I don't understand," he said apologetically, and a little warily. The laugh escaped her then, short and sharp, making him jump before she wrestled it under control. "I... are you okay?"

"No," she admitted honestly, turning to look at him with a strained smile she didn't entirely feel. "But you aren't, either, are you?" She shook her head, ignoring his wide eyes. "I didn't understand, either. Still don't. How God could do something like this, put His children through something like this--"

"Amelia, what's going on? What are you talking about?" Jimmy asked, turning in his seat to face her fully.

"Sam," she said simply. Jimmy froze, stricken and fearful and even a little pained. Amelia swallowed. "A ten year age difference, you said. Seven more years, and your parents are still expecting a girl. You couldn't see or hear me, but I could."

Jimmy swallowed, staring at her. Amelia stared back helplessly, peripherally conscious of the priest approaching them and hesitating, then moving away again.

"Are you angry?" Jimmy asked finally, guarded and uncertain. Amelia shrugged, nodded, then shook her head.

"I'm angry at the situation, but not at you," she clarified, having at least managed to decide that much quickly enough. "It isn't exactly fun knowing I'm not my soulmate's soulmate, but it is what it is. I can't help that I dreamed of you, and you can't help that you  _ didn't _ dream of me." She hesitated, then added, "I might have an option, if you want to hear it."

"Please," Jimmy said faintly. Amelia took a deep breath, steeling her nerves, and looked him in the eye.

"You said that Sam told you not to wait," she said carefully. "Ten years is a long time to be alone, and if you don't have to be, well, it's not like I don't know you'll be contacted by your mutual soulmate in seven years. I did some research between my birthday and today, and there have been cases of multiple soulmates and even soulmates who weren't physically attracted to each other but still had a relationship. I guess I'm offering to... what I'm saying is.... I'll be the girl your parents expect you to marry if you'll be my best friend until death do us part?"


End file.
